sick

This isn’t a bash Beyoncé post, because I love Beyoncé, but this is a post that is going to sound pretty weird…

I hate this song because I am NOT FLAWLESS. AT ALL.

I woke up like this:

Songs nowadays make you want to be this AWESOME I DON’T NEED NO ONE NOTHING IS EVER WRONG person, but the truth this…that is not the truth. I wake up hating life, hating my situation, looking horrible, but the songs right now aren’t on my level. How is this helping out our world when all anyone can think of is materialistic things?

Am I going about this the wrong way? Should I use these songs are ANTHEMS? How do you when you can’t relate..

One song I HATED was Pharrell’s Happy because I was never happy, and the damn song was everywhere!!

Are there any songs that you hate because they make you feel blah? Are there any that are your anthems?

You can not understand how many times I have been unemployed, lost, and feeling like do do…

But not this time. I quit my job because I wasn’t going to work for a manager that talks shit behind my back. I’m bipolar, she just didn’t know…

Also, I hated HATED going into that job everyday. It was torturous to get up and pretend. I’m not a good pretender so it made my life really hard. Sometimes you have to worry about things like jobs, money, advancement, but for me right now it couldn’t be farther from my mind.

Right now I’m focusing on me and what the hell I want to do. My bipolar limits me to work at a conventionally setting without wanting to kill my coworkers and myself for longer than 4 months, so I have to find so,etching that is going to go along with my mind….

And the ride.

In other words, I’m okay and I’ll be okay.

How are you?

P.s. Thanks for all the Greta comments you are leaving me. Since I have no job please watch out for some crazy post… Literally.