Spirituality and who??

Today I visited a family member that lives now lives in a senior citizen community, and I was talking to him about how I am feeling depressed about my life…

We somehow got onto the subject of spirituality. I told him that I am not spiritual at all. It kind of choked me up talking about it. Talking about NOT being spiritual always has made me feel on the verge of crying, but I never do…

Why?

Why do I feel like something is missing everyday? Could it be that I not doing what GOD tells me to do and that’s why I feel bad? Could it be that not being about to believe in anything has me falling deeply into shit? Could it be that I really don’t believe in anything humans say it right or wrong? I mean how do I know what is right for me in a spiritual sense??

What does spirituality do to the mentally illed??

 

…and where can I get some….

Double Agent

I know people with mental illness have to act like double agents everyday, but lately I have been feeling more and more unknown to myself.

everyday I wake up not knowing who I am and what I might do today. This morning, I woke up and decided that I didn’t want to go to work, so I smoked, call my job, and went back to bed. I woke up 3 hours later really kicking myself in the ass for not going.

What is going on with me? Sometimes I’m looking out through eyes that might not be mines.

Am I still going through a rebellious period? Do I have nothing to work and strive for?

Has anyone felt this way? Is it my addiction or my mental illness?

I’M IN A FUCKING SHUTDOWN and that’s okay

I’m feeling word empty at the moment.

There is nothing I truly want to write again. I’m becoming kind of ANTI-The world.
No tv.
No writing.
No spending money.
No hanging out.
No nothing.

I have been stilling quietly for a couple of mins a day. I want to not think about things that have to do with people, or bullshit that doesn’t matter.

Like jobs
Money
The future
Bills
Expectations

I am getting extremely high, but taking my meds and making to do lists daily. I am just trying to find my fucking way.

I’m tired of my mind and my surroundings control me. Controlling me should be me.
:/

Anderson takes part in an experiment to help understand how people live with mental illness

Anderson takes part in an experiment to help understand how people live with mental illness

So glad that people in the public are trying to help out mental illness patients, but I think we may need someone who has a little more IT factor for it to be listened to…

How about Oprah?
Lebron James?
JESUS?

Thanks Anderson for bringing more light on such a dark subject!

Seattle shooting suspect treated for mental illness, attorney says

Seattle shooting suspect treated for mental illness, attorney says

“The suspect in the Thursday shootings at Seattle Pacific University has been treated in recent years for a “long-standing mental illness,” which his attorney said might have prompted the deadly assault inside an engineering building at the small Christian campus.”

Oh really… you don’t say.

It seems like our brethren doesn’t know how to yell out for help. Or maybe the people around them are denying them help. I don’t know what’s going on but I know that there needs to be a way for them to yell out before hurting someone…

 

or maybe they have been yelling for help, but no one is listening…

21 Tips to Keep Your Shit Together When You’re Depressed.

I got this from The DIY Couturier . I hope it helps…

1)   Know that you’re not alone. Know that we are a silent legion, who, every day face the solipsism and judgement of Happy People Who Think We Just Aren’t Trying.  There are people who are depressed, people who have been depressed, and people who just haven’t been hit with it yet.

2)   Understand that the Happy People are usually acting out of some genuine (albeit misguided) concern for you, that it’s coming from a good place, even if the advice feels like you’re being blamed for your disease. Telling you these things makes them feel better, even if it makes you feel like shit. (If they insist on keeping it up, see #12.)

3)   Enlist the help of a professional.  See your doctor. You need to talk about the ugly shit, and there are people paid to listen and help you find your way to the light at the end of the tunnel.  

4)   Understand that antidepressants will only do so much. They’re useful, they’ll level you out and give you the time you need to figure out your own path to getting well. They can be helpful. There are lots to choose from. They may not be for you, and even if they are, they take some time to kick in. Conversely, they may not be for you. Work with your doctor.

5)   Pick up a paintbrush, a pencil, an activity you got joy from in the past and re-explore that.  Or, sign up for the thing you always wanted to try. There is a long history and link between depression and creativity. It’s a bright light of this condition, so utilize it to your best advantage.

6)   Eat nutritionally sound, regular small meals. If you’re having trouble eating, try to focus on what you’d like to eat. I went through a whole six week episode of tomatoes and cream cheese on a bagel twice a day. Not great, but it was something – helpful context, I’m a recovered anorexic. Conversely, if all you want to do is scarf down crap, try to off-ramp it by downing a V-8 and doing #9 for 15 minutes, and see how you feel.  Chucking your blood sugar all over hell’s half acre is going to make you feel worse.

7)   While you’re doing #3, get some bloodwork done. If you’re low on iron or vitamin D, or if your hormone levels are doing the Macarena… these can all contribute to zapping your energy or switching your mood to Bleak As Hell.

8)   If you’re in bed and the “insomnia hamsters”, as I like to call them, are on the wheel of your head, watch Nightly Business News on PBS. This has the effect of Nyquil.  Swap out your coffee for herbal tea. If you just cannot sleep, try the next tip….

9)   Learn how to meditate. Start by focusing on your breathing. Not sleep, not thoughts. In through the nose, out through the mouth. Meditation is focusing on being present in your body, not careening around in your brain. It may not be as good as sleep but it will give you some rest and recharge you.

10)                  Face a window as often as you can – at work, at home. Look out into the world. Watch. Observe. Try to find something you find pretty or interesting to focus on. And, handily remember that one in five of those people out there feel the way you do.

11)                  Cry. Better out than in. Sometimes it’s not convenient or career-enhancing to cry, so find a private place as best you can and let the tears go. Carry Kleenex and face wipes and extra concealer if you wear makeup. You can always claim allergies.

12)                   Any “friend” who resolutely believes that your depression is because you’re lazy, because you’re not trying hard enough, who blames you for not bootstrapping out of it- that friend needs to be cut off. Polite (#2) is one thing, but there is a limit. You don’t have to explain, you can just not respond. You feel badly enough, you don’t need their “assistance”.

13)                  Limit your time with people who drain you. You know who they are. Often you don’t have a choice- but you can put the meter on. And, subsequently, be aware of what you’re asking of those close to you.

14)                  Everyone has shit they’ve got to deal with. What you have been saddled with is your shit. Recognize, just as you’re not alone, you’re also not unique. The grass may look greener, you may be jealous or envious of others who don’t have to deal with depression, but you likely do not know everything that’s going on with them.  

15)                  Let go or be dragged. This is an old Buddhist saying. It’s a very useful way to frame aspects of depression. Betrayal, anger, fear… letting go is a process – often a painful and difficult process – but it’s ultimately going to show you the path out of this terrible place. Repeating the mantra can help when you’re feeling gripped by these feelings.

16)                  Wear clothes that make you feel confident. It takes as much time to put on nice clothes as it does to put on sweatpants. You will want to wear the sweatpants. Fight the urge. The whole “look good/feel better” campaign isn’t limited to cancer and chemotherapy. Or women.

17)                  Avoid fictional drama and tragedy like the plague. No Grey’s Anatomy, no to The Notebook, or anything that won a Pulitzer prize. You’ve got enough going on In Real Life. Comedy only.  Or trashy stuff. Old episodes of WonderWoman? I’ve got the box set. Mindless drivel, like the latest CGI blockbuster. Or clever, funny books. David Sedaris. Jenny Lawson. Fiction exists to elicit emotion, and the emotion you need to express most right now is laughter.

18)                  Simple exercise, if you can. It can be something as simple as taking the stairs up a flight, or walking around the block. It doesn’t have to be elaborate, it doesn’t have to involve climbing a mountain or running a marathon. Baby steps.

19)                  Depression will lie to you. Depression will try to tell you what others are thinking.  That you are unloved and unworthy, that others think little of you or don’t care – or even wish you harm. You are not a psychic. Keep repeating that. “I am not a psychic”.  Repeat. The only way to know what another person is thinking is to up and ask them.

20)                  If you are well and truly losing this battle, reach out to someone. I’ve been the random friendly-but-not-close person who has fielded the occasional outreach. I like to think I’m not judgemental and generally resourceful, and others have thought the same, so they called and asked. You know someone like me. And they will help you.

21)                  Forgive yourself.  I’m writing out all these tips, and I can’t always muster the strength to even stick my nose outside, or walk up the stairs, or eat my vegetables. Today, I got outside for ten minutes. I will try again tomorrow. And I will try again the day after that.

Too much time on web ‘gives children mental health problems’

Too much time on web ‘gives children mental health problems’

Well, DUH!

There is no sunshine. No interacting with friends. No running, jumping, falling, hitting, laughing until the street lights come on.

Kids now are hook into the Matrix all day long with cellphones, internet, TV, radio. Anything and everything prevents them from going into the fresh air. Soon we will be looking like the people off of the Disney movie ‘WALL-E’:

Lazy, with a side of Mental Illness.

What do you think?

Fort Hood shooter was Iraq vet being treated for mental health issues

Fort Hood shooter was Iraq vet being treated for mental health issues

I am sorry for the people lost in this tragic accident.

That being said, this is another example of how the media portrays mental illness. Tomorrow, everyone with a mental illness will be looked at in a different light by people who don’t have mental illness themselves. I not saying your mother, brother, wife, or child. I am talking about the “world” view.

I wish in cases like these, they tell you what mental illness is, how it can affect a person’s mind and life. I wish they would let us talk.