But for how long..

I’m having a hard time finding the time to write and the material to write.

My brain is feeling fine. My emotions are in check, but what is going on.. where am I? I thought once you find the “right” dose your suppose to be right back at where you was. Where “was” I? Who was I before mental illness knocked me on my ass and made me into who I am today.

I think my husband is having a hard time with the semi-restricted me. I go to bed the same time every night, i’m saving money, not spending every cent I have. Things are changing inside and out

but for how long?…

Moods of Colors

I love color, so when I say this I wanted to share it. I already knew colors effect the brain, but not how much in depth. For your day pick out THREE colors that you want to use in your life and comment on this post and tell me.

My colors will be: Foilage Green, Peach, Golden Yellow

What will yours be?

Astrology vs. Mental Illness: Mercury Retrograde

Do you know about the Mercury Retrograde that just happened? Do you know what I’m even talking about? No, I’m not talking Klingon ( I wish I could though…)

Galadarling explains it like this:

“If you have no idea what I’m talking about, here we go. The planets are swinging around at all times, and their movements affect us all in different ways. All planets go retrograde, but Mercury’s journey seems to impact people much more than any other. (Even people who “don’t believe in astrology” often “believe” in the crazy aftershocks of Mercury retrograde!)

Why is that? It’s because Mercury rules communication, clear thinking, truth and travel, so when the planet goes retrograde — which means that it looks like it’s going backwards in the sky — all those things go backwards. They start to get ugly and tangle up. Mercury isn’t really going backwards, it’s just hanging out by the sun, but from Earth, that makes it look like it’s in reverse. It typically runs for a couple of weeks, a few times a year.”

Clear thinking? Hmm..

Can the stars affect mental illness and effect our lives?

WELL… the period that it happened in 2014 was:

• February 6–28
• June 7–July 2
• October 4–25

and everything was ugly ugly ugly for me. My husband and I were money fighting, bad communication about everything, my cell dead and never turned back on. Ugly! What about you? Looking back, was your bad period during these dates? The 2015 periods are going to be Jan 21 – Feb 11, May 18 – Jun 11, and Sept 7 – Oct 9, 2015.

What do you think???

You’re Just Like Me: Hypomanicmama

So you have a mental illness.. Which
Bipolar II

When were you diagnosis & how old were you?

I was diagnosed when I was 18 years old when I was a freshman in college. It was the start of many years of out of control reckless behavior.

How do you cope with your mental illness?

TAKE MY MEDS! I’m currently on Lithium, Risperedone, Latuda, Lamictal, Zoloft and Klonopin. I don’t go anywhere without my Klonopin because once I get hit with that butterfly feeling in my stomach, I know whats coming and I need to get a handle on it before it spirals out of control.

I also see my therapist 2x a week and Medication Management biweekly.

My family doesn’t understand my disorder and think I can just grow up and snap out of it so they choose to ignore it. My husband is the only person who I have to lean on which doesn’t always help me because he himself has OCD and Major Depressive Disorder.

Lots of personal pep talks to myself to get through the day.

What are 3 words that you would describe how your illness makes you feel?

irratic, angry, exhausted

What are some ways you relax from your illness?

I remove myself from everyone. I refinish furniture for fun so I will try and get into a project but it doesn’t always work. I’ve spent many hours sitting on the steps to my shop and just staring out into nothing. Everything is silent and it feels great for my brain.

What is some advice you would give to your fellow soldiers fighting this fight?

Find support. Personally, I do not like groups. I am uncomfortable around a group of strangers that I have to talk to let alone divulge intimate information about myself. With a family that isn’t really supportive of what I am going through, I lean on my husband a lot and have one friend that I will text when I’m feeling like the poo will be hitting the fan. Sometimes, no matter how crazy your mind is going, its good to just verbalize it and get it out. Almost like letting the air out of a balloon. If you think you can keep everything in and be ok, you are wrong and something, usually a little thing will make everything fall apart.

Do you have any books, websites, writers, shows, music, etc that has helped you cope that you like to share?

There is a podcast by Stuff you should know on Bipolar disorder. It was one of the best explanations of how I feel and what I go through that I have ever heard. It was matter of fact and very objective. I send the podcast link to friends or family that are trying to understand whats going on in my life.

Tell us your blog or how we can keep in contact with you?

hypomanicmama.wordpress.com

2 jobs, one illness.

Today, I got offered a job, and an interview at another one. Both jobs I have done before (work-wise), but I don’t know which one will work out for me….and my bipolar.

One I’m working with people, the other machines. One I am sitting down all day, the other I am moving constantly. Which one will be good for my and this disease?…

How do you pick something when you know you have to factor in your bipolar?

Very carefully..i guess…