I woke up 2 hours ago, mad. Mad at my husband for turning on the heat in the middle of the night. I literally woke him out of sleep to yell at him. Now, I’m still so mad I can’t go back to sleep..
What is wrong with me? Why can’t I just let things go? My mind feel so tight right now, like I’m about to get a killer headache.
Why can’t I ever sleep through the night without waking up because I’m congested or mad?
Oh, I know why!
MENTAL FUCKING FUCK YOU ILLNESS!! AARRRRRRRRGGHHHH!!!!!!!
Its 4am, and I’m awake.
This happens because I’m taking Seroquel. I also think I’m becoming a little dependent on it. I started taking two, just so I can get to sleep faster. I’m not use to going to sleep at 10pm every night. I don’t know what I’m going go do about the weekends.
I’ve been having crazy dreams. They seem so real. I try to write them down, but sometime they fade away fast. The last one I wrote down was about killers, which is weird because tonight my fiance woke up and told me about a dream where there was a killer in the house. I sometimes have a dream about a house, where I can’t get upstairs, but something or someone is up there killing people. I always end up running outside. I told myself next time I dream that dream, I’m going upstairs to face it….
These are really just rants. My mood is okay, my stomach is full with raisin bread and butter, which I just ate. If I stay up too long, my mind will start running, and running.
Bipolar is a fucking loser boy in high school.