After listening to your comments on the last post I’ve made…and feeling how I am feeling..

Meds sucks.

I feel super hype at night before bed. My heart is pounding, my mouth is dry and I’m always so thirsty! I feel uncontrollable happy, and my head is ringing with a slight headache ever night. The worst is the energy that I can’t seem to burn off.

The good side is I’ve really stopped smoking. I don’t have a craving for anything, and I THINK I have lost weight. I’m not eating as much anymore.

UGH! I want to stop taking it, but my doctor told me this medicine is one that you can not just stop taking, you have to slowly come down off of it.

Today though, you can be proud of me, well I’m PROUD OF MYSELF. I was feeling really depressed/angry today, and my husband was trying to cheer me up, but I was just snapping on him and being a bitch. I felt really down about a few other things and it built up. Well, he left the house to leave me alone, and I called him just before he left the parking space because I REFUSE TO SIT IN THE HOUSE BY MYSELF, AND BE DEPRESSED OR SAD ANYMORE! I REFUSE! I will not give up on myself, and give into my shitty feeling mode. So, I left the house, got into the car, and went out with him. I kind of a had a semi-breakdown in the car, but never mind that I GOT OUT and changed the way I was feeling. I had a really good night after all, and now know that it might not be ME that makes me feel depressed, but its ME that stays depressed…

Please, if your feeling depressed or sad, GET OUT, move around, go outside, and join life. You will see that even though you hate it, its better than sitting alone…dying.

Lesson learned. Now, if I can only do something quicker about these meds….

5 thoughts on “YOUR RIGHT! MEDS SUCK!!

  1. Hey, you sound sharp! I just emailed someone I had been avoiding (a grandmother), and you are right! Facing that depression makes me feel… strong. Not good, not happy, but fucking strong. Like I can weather the sea!

    I want you to know I find a lot of solace in your blog. All the other illness blogs I’ve found I either couldn’t relate to or were preachy. Tomorrow I’m going in for extensive testing for the first time in 7 years. I might get reclassified. I don’t know what that means, but I’m kinda scared. I just gotta be strong, weather it out. Like you! Just get out of the house.


Rant on, my friends!

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